So Turned ON
Mr. Universe I am sooooooooooo glad you are here finally for the rate of my answered questions is at about 20 percent from all the thought leaders and guru's around the glode. YOU however produce information and inspiration that NO one I know can or has ever matched. I have ONLY two major questions in life and here there are in a P.C. shell. :smt002
1: Are there going to be animals in heaven? 
2: Will there be sex in heaven? I know their won't be marriage but it doesn't say the other right? :smt005
I suspect cyber bob is not so worried about Elephants as he is about his dearly departed cat......RIP. I have the unpopular belief that our pets will not be in heaven, seems to me that little thing about choice make it pretty clear. On the off chance I am wrong it could get pretty crowded, my 50 cows will need their space. Of course there are the naysayers that will say cows are not pets but my girls come running when I call and enjoy a good scratch behind the ears as much as any dog and I suspect more so then the average fish. :smt002
As for the question on relations I cannot wait to see what a perfect body is really supposed to operate like.............. 
I have a question Mr. U, oh great Guru of the western and eastern hemisphere. Years ago my friend asked me to watch his cat. One fine cold Montana winter's morning I went out into the fray and found his cat frozen solid, deader than than those mammaths found in the frozen tundra of the far north. When I attempted to bury him the ground was frozen, as well. Niether ice pick nor shovel could break that ground and I was forced to toss him in a dumpster. The dumpster was empty and poor George hit the bottom with a resounding bang like only a cat turned popsicle can do. When I finally told my friend what happened, he admitted that he had done the same thing while watching my cat, Huleo, who strangely disappeared while I was away.
My question is this; How can we assuade the guilt and mend our respective relationships with our cats when we get to heaven?
This question has haunted me since your asking, I believe that that icy cat will appear in many a dream for many MOONS as OUR people would say and I await Mr. Universes response :smt005
ps.........I am calling him right NOW :smt007
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Dear Horny Animal Lover,
I know there will be animals in heaven because Teacher Jane at the Pioneer Memorial
Church where Perry and Debby Melnychenko and I took our tiny girls for Kindergarten Sabbath School taught us the words of this holy song,
"A great big Lion in heaven,
A great Big Kitty there'll be,
A great big Lion in heaven,
And he won't be afraid of me!"
After which she would say in her wonderfully sweet voice,
"Do you know boys and girls what other animal there will be in heaven?" (At this point my sweet 1 year old Judith's eyes are as big as saucers.)
Teacher Jane continues, "There is going to be an Elephant!"
Here comes the music while a child gets to come and sit on the monster stuffed elephant at the front,
"A great big Elephant in heaven,
A great big packiderm there'll be,
A great big Peanut-Eater in heaven,
And he won't be afraid of me!"
Teacher Jane said it, I believe it, and that settles it for me! Relax animalist, there will be big game in heaven!
Incidentally, you can say a nary word about anyone on earth and I won't mess with you, but if you say anything about Teacher Jane, I'm going to ROCK YOUR WORLD!!!!!
The answer to your other question(let's just be honest, your real question Honry Flake Especially), is really the same answer. Notice that Teacher Jane sang, "And [i]he[i] won't be afraid of me." she wouldn't have sung "he" if there was no sex in heaven. Anyone with a thinking aparatus(Yes I know all men have apparati of which they have great pride, but just now I want to address the thinking part of your bodies guys, rather than what controls 99.999999999% of your lives, i.e. your protrusions men if I must spell it out!)will know that if there is "he" in heaven, there will be sex because that is a man's special purpose in life! He may not get much work done ladies, but let's just say, "He WORKS IT!"
Just to assure...the previous statement is made regarding all other men out there, but Mr. Universe is different and much more noble! I acutally use my brain .000000002% of the time, rather than the .000000001% that other men manage, which as anyone with a thinking apparatus can easily see is double impressive!
Thank you for your stimulating question Horny!
Love to each and all,
Mr. U,
Boldly Seeking, Finding, and Defeating Ignorance and Nastiness wherever found!
Giving the left hand of Fellowship!